Today

is my first day back in a morning shift at work.

It's also my first full-time day in a long, long time.

I am pregnant. This means I suffer from lack of sleep. Always.

It also means I have pregnant brain.

Just to give you an idea of how those two mix, let me tell you how my day has gone so far.

- I made an 88 year old lady cry. She called to check on a medication and I told her she had an appointment tomorrow. Turns out the appointment is for September 20th. Also turns out old people don't like surprises.

- While waiting on hold, the other side picked up as I was mid-yawn. I tried to talk through my yawn. It didn't work. I tried to apologize and my voice cracked like a teenage boy. The caller on the other side really enjoyed my professionalism. 

- I misinterpreted Shandi's question of, "Is she new?" to a statement of, "She is good." Needless to say, she was extremely confused by my response.

I have also gotten endless comments about how much food is on my desk right now.

Lay off me, I'm starving. (snl, anyone? anyone?)

With how well work is going, I can only imagine I'll be a fantastic mother.